Small Sample of What I Learned in Kenya & Ecuador

- The truth of nonviolence.
- A pineapple will grow if you plant the top of one.
- A giving mentality results in surplus & a taking mentality results in scarcity.
- How to set a candle.
- That discipline requires delaying gratification, accepting responsibility, seeking truth, and balance.
- Self-discipline is self-caring.
- My philosophy of education.
- How to make beds for a garden.
- How to make lasagna, apple sauce, soup, and a French potato dish.
- Some Kiiswahili & some Spanish.
- How to play chess, euchre, casino, wist, contract wist, the spider game, and OMO.
- My world view.
- That I am the absence of myself.
- The usefulness of a walking stick.
- You can accomplish anything if you have enough intensity.

- Sometimes we live a whole lot in a few short, amazing weeks (or even days).

Firsts in Ecuador

- Being in South America
- Being in a jungle
- Being in a cloud forest

- Getting engaged (FIRST AND ONLY)
- Eating ostrich
- Eating guinea pig
- Repairing a water pipe
- Climbing waterfalls and not exactly knowing how to get down
- Fishing in the Pacific Ocean (CJ) - Swimming in the Pacific Ocean

- Seeing an active volcano
- Feeling an earthquake
- Helping an Ecuadorian fisherman push his wooden boat 100ft up on the beach using two logs
- Going to volcanic hot baths
- Actually getting in the volcanic hot baths (CJ) - Moving a dead body
- Helping with a traditional Ecuadorian wake/funeral
- Getting a hot stone massage (ML)
- Volunteering at a Spanish speaking after-school program
- Planting/maintaining a vegetable garden, flower garden, and orchard - Making apple sauce…Ecuadorian style
- Making fresh-squeezed jungle lemonade
- Making fresh herbal teas
- Getting a tummy ache from eating too many delicious wild raspberries (ML)
- Winning a chess match (ML)
- Feeding a horse (CJ)
- Giving guitar lessons (CJ)…in Spanish!
- Flying with cremated remains…internationally
- Flying with Meow Mix… internationally

U.S. Military Draft - In Effect

Question: When was the last American drafted into the U.S. military?

If you answered during the Vietnam War, I would have to disagree. If fact, if you said anytime prior to today, you are probably wrong. Maybe yesterday at the most.

This is because the current U.S. “volunteer” military is largely a draft of the poor, unemployed, and undereducated. Sure there are a few who grow up planning to join the military, but there are others, MANY others, who do it out of sheer economic necessity. A few months ago I spent a long weekend on Fort Bliss in El Paso, TX. While there, I hung out with probably a dozen young soldiers, all of which enlisted because they could not find a job and either could not afford college or were not mentally ready for college at that point in their lives. Recruiters enticed them with a salary, bonus checks, a buff body, job skills, sharp looking class-As, money for college, “honor,” a brotherhood, etc. It saddened me to meet all these kids who signed up for economic reasons, hoping to never go to war.

Why must the Government lure us in with such things? Here are two reasons. One, because our moral intuitions tell us that killing another human is wrong. And not only our moral intuitions, but also our parents, our former Sunday school teachers, and our Government itself! Each of these groups ingrains in us the fact that killing is wrong, which is great because our moral intuition agrees. For instance, we pay taxes to fund police officers, prosecutors, and investigators because killing is against the law, because it is wrong. We know that if we kill another person the consequence is either capital punishment or life imprisonment.

But wait a second, isn’t the Government that decides and enforces this the same Government that convinces us to enlist in the military; where to kill brings “honor” and medals upon ones’ self?! It is! Now I am confused. My Government says that if I, acting as a civilian, take the life of another human I have committed the most horrific, immoral crime, and will be punished accordingly. But, if I, acting as a soldier, take the life of another human or one hundred humans or one thousand humans, I will be glorified. OF COURSE recruiters must strongly appeal to us economically, and otherwise, because what they’re sponsoring completely contradicts the truth that we both instinctively know and also have been taught (by them)!

Another reason our Government works so hard to persuade us into joining the military is because “[w]ars do not have to be sold to the general public if they can be carried out by an all-volunteer professional military” (M. Kurlansky). I have read that the Vietnam War was hugely unpopular. Although this did nothing in teaching our Government the evil of warfare in general, they did learn to avoid a legal draft, in order to keep people quieter. As a result, we don’t think a draft is taking place currently. We are wrong. “Every time a voice is heard of the privileged, a politician, a business leader, Major League Baseball, Hollywood, one of the millionaires who present television news, saluting ‘the courage of our fighting men and women,’ who they claim – against all logic – are ‘defending our freedom,’ listen closely and you will hear…the rich bamboozling the poor” (M. Kurlansky). Every time a commercial airs such war propaganda as, “Strong. Army Strong” or “The Few…The Proud…The Marines” we are viewing an unfortunate and effective draft of at least the poor, the unemployed, and the undereducated.

A true story: “…Clifford Cornell of Arkansas, three years out of high school and jobless, walked into an army recruitment office in a shopping mall. Interviewed in Toronto [three years later], he said, ‘I didn’t know anything about Afghanistan or the possibility of going to Iraq.’ The Army recruiter had promised that he would never be sent overseas. ‘His job is to lie,’ said Cornell. ‘I have learned through two years in the military that most of what they tell you is a lie. They have to lie to get people to sign up…All I heard is ‘If you sign up for this you get a $9,000 bonus.’ ’
When Cornell learned he was being shipped out to Iraq, he went to his sergeant and said, ‘I’m not supposed to be shipped overseas. The recruiter said so.’ The sergeant just laughed.” Cornell drove to Toronto and deserted. “ ‘It was not an easy choice,’ he said. ‘You are trained in the military to have loyalty to your buddies.’ ”

Cornell’s story, in terms of how he was drafted and the treatment he received in the military, is not the exception.

Young men and women are being persuaded to enlist in the military and it is working simply due to a lack of options. I remember attending Project Graduation the night I graduated high school, in which my senior class stayed up until 6am playing games and hanging out together at a church. Upon entering the church we were each given a t-shirt to wear that night. Inspired from the theme of the night, Dr. Seuss’s “Oh the Places You’ll Go,” the front of the shirt portrayed a signpost offering the Lemon Bay High School class of 2003 a whopping three routes to take after the festivities of that night ended. One arrow pointed to the workforce, one pointed to college, and the third pointed to the military. Unfortunately, the workforce can’t always handle the population of willing workers, as is the current situation. Similarly, young people don’t always have the financial means or the readiness/maturity right out of high school to enroll in college, which are both entirely understandable. The only option left is one in which we the people experience all the disadvantages of a legal draft, while the Government experiences all the advantages of a legal draft.

After you, as a poor, unemployed, or undereducated person, sign up for the military it can do anything it wants with you and you can’t do anything about it, because you willing signed up. But did you?

I urge you to help young people avoid the draft by securing opportunities that actually are voluntary.

Evil Can Not Be Subdued By Evil

Why do we engage in war?

We are told by those in high authority that the reason we go to war is to produce and preserve peace, liberty, blah blah blah. I do not write “blah blah blah” because I do not value peace and liberty, but because the statement that warfare is necessary for these things is a lie. Not only is warfare NOT necessary, it completely contradicts these ideals, and makes them impossible to attain.

Revenge, pride, the desire for power…these are the seeds of carnal warfare. Not peace. “From these [seeds] grow all the quarreling among children, the discord among families, the bickering, law suits, and broils among neighbors, the boxing among bullies, the dueling among modern gentlemen, and wars among nations” (D. Dodge).

Consider your own experiences. Repaying evil for evil on the individual level never achieves peace, and actually only destroys it. What happens in your own life when someone hurts you (emotionally, physically, etc.) and you seek revenge? What happens when you attempt to “settle the score” with a “dose of his/her own medicine?” When you hit a person, offensively or defensively, whether with your words or your fists, what happens?

So what makes us believe war on the international level will usher in a world of lasting peace and liberty? Maybe it is because that is the wisdom we glean from history! That must be it considering how in other pursuits we humans gain wisdom through experience. Oh wait, I seem to remember learning about not one, but two, wars “to end all wars” and still my brother, Kyle, is in Afghanistan armed with missiles. I have read and heard a lot of statistics regarding the ratio of wars to years in the past 100 years. Though different sources cite different numbers, they all list more than 100 wars. Over 100 wars in one century, more wars than years! And what has been the result? A very short list includes the loss of liberty, the destruction of property, homes, schools, theaters, sports arenas, museums, libraries, and churches, an increase in orphans and widows, the oppression of the poor and underprivileged, and over 160 million people dead. Huh.

It appears the real wisdom, dare I say the truth, is that war can do nothing to end war because evil cannot be subdued by evil. Two wrongs do not make a right. Error cannot be corrected by error. A “War on Terror” cannot eradicate terror; it can, has, and will only multiply it.

It is returning good for evil that overcomes evil. If you are a Christian, consider Christ’s teachings to “not resist an evil person. If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also” (Matthew 5:39). Christ teaches us to “love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (Matthew 5:44), and to “do to others what you would have them do to you” (Matthew 7:12). In fact, the second greatest commandment, after loving God, is to “Love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22: 39). The list goes on and on. "Christ's teachings, which came to be known to men, not by means of violence and the sword, but by means of non-resistance to evil, gentleness, meekness, and peaceableness, can only be diffused through the world by the example of peace, harmony, and love among its followers" (Tolstoy).

If you do not believe in Christ consult your common sense once more. In your life is genuine and lasting peace secured through arguments and violence? I’m not talking the “peace” when you and your spouse or you and your child argue so much that you give up. That is only temporary. My experiences have proven, as I’m sure yours have as well, that unless you honestly transcend issue(s) through communication based in love the fighting, in time, will resume. We are much more wise before hostilities commence. It is then, when we humble ourselves and remain calm, that reconciliation is efficiently and effectively achieved, with our friends as well as our foes.

The same principle applies in international relations because according to Ballou, “[t]rue non-resistance is the only real resistance to evil. To injure another because he has injured us, even with the aim of overcoming evil, is doubling the harm for him and for oneself; it is begetting, or at least setting free and inciting, that evil spirit which we should wish to drive out. If all men refused to resist evil by evil our world would be happy.”

The preservation of peace and the prevention of war can not be achieved by building sophisticated weapons and training young men and women to kill humans with their hands, just like the preservation of good health and the prevention of obesity can not be achieved by eating McDonalds for every meal and leading a completely sedentary lifestyle. I recently heard about a bumper sticker that I will paraphrase by saying, going to war to preserve peace is like engaging in sex to preserve one’s virginity. To put a G rating on it: “War is no more adapted to preserve liberty and produce a lasting peace than midnight darkness is to produce noonday light” (D. Dodge).

Ghandi knew this when he used nonviolent tactics to win India’s independence. Poland, Hungary, and Czechoslovakia knew this when they overcame the Soviet Union using nonresistance. Te Whiti knew this when he nonviolently stopped a war of genocide that would have wiped out New Zealand’s Maori people. A group of women known as “Las Madres de Plaza de Mayo” knew this when they nonviolently contributed to the collapse of a ruthless Argentinean regime.

And you know this.

If you agree with the points I have made I urge you to examine your life for actions you may be taking which promote any spirit of violence, from arguing with a neighbor to endorsing the war in Iraq and Afghanistan. Recognize any inconsistency between truth and your actions and being to change.

If you do not agree with the points I have made I challenge you to examine your thoughts, words, and actions and determine what the results are when they are based in love vs. when they are based in anything less.

Dodge, D. (1812). War Inconsistent with the Religion of Jesus Christ.

Kurklasnsky, M. (2006). Nonviolence: The History of a Dangerous Idea.

Tolstoy, L. (1894). The Kingdom of God Within You.

The Student Study Bible. New International Version.

Recent Ecuador Happenings!!

-A couple weekends ago the volunteers piled into the back of a truck and rode out to Pondoa, a community living on the side of the volcano, to read books and do activities with the children living there. (We had to have a motorcycle police escort drive in front of us either so the community people wouldn’t think we were coming to traffic their children or so people wouldn’t think the driver was trafficking us…not sure which one though). About 20 kids turned out by bicycle, foot, and on horse to their very rural basketball court. The activities included making bracelets out of paper beads and presenting a puppet show about a dancing guinea pig. The kids seemed to thoroughly enjoy the visit.

-Remember the hot baths I mentioned in my last blog post? Well Richard and Carmen go the baths a few times every week and always invite us. Here are the details of the one and only time we’ve joined them. We arrived at the hot baths, paid the two dollar entrance fee per person, changed into what we were going to wear in the baths, went to turn in our baskets containing the clothes we came in and then proceed to the baths, and I was denied. Being from an island where I swam A LOT growing up, and many times unexpectedly (you’re out fishing, it’s hot, naturally you jump in the water…clothes and all), I planned on wearing a t-shirt and gym shorts in the hot baths because I did not bring a bathing suit. For Ecuadorians it’s a no-no to swim in clothes. It’s also a no-no to refund people who pay to use the hot baths and then don’t because you won’t let them. Instead, they responded “you should have rented a swimsuit for $1.” Neither CJ nor I knew enough Spanish to tell them how disgusting that is! Oh well, while I sat and watched everyone enjoy the healing powers of the hot baths two 17-year-old Ecuadorian girls came and sat with me and we attempted to converse…it was mostly giggles though as I don’t speak much Spanish and they spoke even less English.

-CJ taught me how to play chess and now I am constantly searching for opportunities to play. Sometimes I win.

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I have read OnlyConnect, which is about transforming the public school system in America; Nonviolence: The History of a Dangerous Idea, which changed my life drastically (more on that later); The Year of Living Biblically, which made me laugh out loud and taught me a considerable amount about the Bible; Conversations with God (highly recommend); Civil Disobedience; and War Inconsistent with the Religion of Jesus Christ (recommend). I am currently reading The Outliers, which discusses why certain people succeed in their chosen field based on opportunity, as well as The Kingdom of God Within You, which receives my highest recommendation.

-We accepted an invitation to a home church meeting by an Ecuadorian woman, Yessi, who works at Arte del Mundo (where we volunteer). The small group meets four evenings a week. The Thursday evening we attended there were six Ecuadorians and the two of us. It was very similar to small group meetings CJ and I have experienced in America, in that we sang hymns, prayed communally, read scripture, and talked about scripture. It was a nice evening with kind people who love Jesus…and who I could only communicate with through my translators Yessi and CJ. I’m not certain of this but I believe CJ and I are the only two non-Ecuadorians who have ever joined them…which seemed to really thrill them. We are planning to join them again on a Saturday evening when the meetings are held around a campfire!

-Making dinner is nearly always a science experiment, which scares Richard and thrills us…especially when the meal tastes good (which thankfully it always does)! Our newest specialties include “Jungle Junk” and veggie lasagna (which still needs a fun name). Last night we made delicious homemade applesauce, Ecuadorian style.

-We have planted radishes, sweet potatoes, broccoli, lettuce, and Swiss char. We’ve also weeded, weed wacked, sawed down trees, planted trees, re-planted trees, and uncovered trees from weeds.

-Wedding plans – Nearly everything is planned except the two most important things…date and place! We may be having the most fun any two people have ever had planning their wedding. For instance, which sharing a plate of Ostrich at an Argentinean Restaurant, where the atmosphere made me feel like we were living in a tree house with the Lost Boys in Peter Pan, we thoroughly discussed “strongly encouraging” our wedding guests to wear tie-dye. There is only one ironic situation with the wedding. The United States Army, which CJ and I are both very much oppose to, is making it challenging to decide on a date and place. This is because one of my two extraordinary brothers, Kyle, was deployed to Afghanistan last week with a vague idea of when he will return.

-Speaking of war, CJ and I are in the process of undertaking a challenging project…that of becoming nonviolence activists. After reading, thinking, and discussing a great deal about nonviolence we’ve made it a common life goal to educate people about nonviolence. We are researching and brainstorming a variety of opportunities, from teaching nonviolence classes at the University level to traveling around presenting nonviolence seminars to working for specific nonviolent campaigns. Be prepared for the future of my blog to discuss such ideas as our “voluntary” military being nothing more than a draft of the poor, violence only leading to more violence, human nature, why you can’t promote both Christ and a violent military, the history of violence, the history of nonviolence, and MUCH more. CJ will also be writing nonviolence posts and his writing is sure to be more witty and thought provoking than mine so check it out at http://www.cjdates.blogspot.com/!!

Settled Down in Ecuador!!

INTERESTING BITS ABOUT BANOS

- Multiple entire streets are lined with vendors selling taffy, tangerines, and sugar cane at small stands. In the States it would be like eighteen McDonalds and Wendys on one block, all lined up, and sharing walls! And we think pharmacies and gas stations on every corner is a little much!

- The rest of the streets are lined with hostels, massage parlors, restaurants, internet cafes, and adventure tours (offering bungy jumping, horseback riding, whitewater rafting, jungle excursions, etc).

- Garbage is collected every night by a dump truck blaring the ice cream truck tune!!

- Many, many, many private and city walls are covered in really neat murals and graffiti. There is such an abundance of it and it is such great art that CJ and I have already devoted two days to walking around taking pictures of it, totaling over 350 pictures, and there is still more we want! We collect art from everywhere we travel and our piece from Ecuador is going to be a book of our graffiti and mural pictures!

- They don’t flush toilet paper down the toilet. It all (and I mean ALL) goes in a little trashcan sitting next to the toilet. This is true for private homes, as well as businesses.

- Every funeral includes a walking funeral procession down the narrow one-way streets of Banos.

- Guinea pig is a delicacy. They cook it by roasting the entire guinea pig (eyes, tail, claws and all) on a stick over a grill. CJ and I are going to try it this week.

- Banos is named after it’s world-renowned hot baths, which according to National Geographic offer the greatest health benefit of any hot baths in the world. At the hot baths there are pools of murky light brown water, rich in nutrients and heated by the volcano, as well as cold swimming pools. You are supposed to go back and forth from the hot to the cold nine times, sitting in each for a few minutes.

- Lunch is the most important meal of the day and children get out of school at 1 pm to go home for lunch. It’s crazy in town around that time as there are hundreds of school kids walking in packs and messing around with each other.

ARTE DE MUNDO

We have served at Arte del Mundo (a.k.a. the Bib) for two weeks and things are going wonderfully! The organization offers an adult and children’s library and after-school program from 3:30pm-6:30pm Monday-Friday, as well as English classes for adults and kids from 2pm-8pm Monday-Thursday. CJ teaches two 30-minute guitar classes each day, one for girls and one for boys. Once his lessons are over he helps with the after-school program (usually playing chess with the kids) and does miscellaneous beautification/construction projects around the property. I’ve been helping in the two activity rooms by playing games with the kids (Uno, Jenga, Set, Dutch Blitz) and doing projects (making bookmarks and jewelry), helping in the children’s library by reading to and being read to by the kids, and also getting involved in the kid’s photography class. It is a really fun place and the kids love it.

CASA DE RICARDO

As far as our living arrangements go, it’s quite the experience! We are living with an American man, Richard, and his Ecuadorian girlfriend, Carmen. He spent the majority of his life moving around the world building and restoring houses (beginning with no experience) and through doing that has lived in 20 different countries! Richard also had a pineapple farm in Costa Rica, was a Buddhist Monk in Japan (though at this point he has “a low opinion of all religions”), and I can’t even imagine what else! Everyday is an adventure to say the least. Carmen is a masseuse with her own massage business in town. They are housing us for free in a rustic 3-story home Richard restored, in exchange for us working in their garden an hour or two each day. They have amazing flower gardens and a fruit orchard with oranges, tangerines, lemons, limes, walnuts, and avacados. We are currently planting a vegetable garden (so they can sustain themselves when the world turns to chaos).

Ecuador: The 12th Country I’ve Experienced Outside the U.S. and My Favorite!

Two weeks and more golden moments than I could have ever imagined! As in Kenya my goals for this trip are to serve, to love, to learn, and to be aware, with the added one of investigating what makes a successful volunteer program. The night before we flew to Ecuador I conjured up a new career option…to be a volunteer program consultant. In this role I would figure out what makes a successful volunteer program, go out and volunteer, and then consult with the administrators on how to improve their program in order to make it more effective for all parties involved. I have never heard of this type of consulting, but if you have, and wouldn’t mind saving me some research time, please share your insight below or in an email!

ANYHOO, you’re probably wondering what CJ and I have been up to our first two weeks in Ecuador. There are four main aspects of our trip to this point I would like to share including, the town of Banos, the jungle, Katitawa School, and most important OUR ENGAGEMENT J!

BANOS: Upon arriving in the capital, Quito, CJ and I hightailed it to Banos to meet Linda, my nephew’s grandma. This took five hours by taxi and bus through the most lush mountains and past the most waterfalls I hadever seen. As we neared Banos CJ & I saw our first ever view of an active volcano, as dark smoke billowed out of Tungurahua. (We have yet to see lava but are planning a late night walk to do just that pretty soon.) Once we found Linda she walked us around Banos, a quaint town geared toward adventure-seeking tourists. She introduced us to her many Gringo & Ecuadorian friends and showed us the best cafes, markets, hostels, internet places, parks, etc.

We were both immediately captivated by the warmness of the people, the menu of things to experience, the cleanliness, and the surrounding view of enormous green mountains with mysterious clouds toward their tops and waterfalls cascading down their sides, and of course the active volcano. Linda lives a 30 minute bus ride and one hour walk through the jungle away from Banos and goes there every few days to restock on supplies, as she does not have electricity. Her log home in the jungle has served as CJ and I’s primary home so far. Banos has become our second home. * So all you sports fans can rest easier know that CJ and I made a special trip into Banos to watch the Super Bowl and continue making special trips to watch the Olympics…all with Spanish commentating (and normally the volume turned down).

WELCOME TO THE JUNGLE: Linda owns 185 acres in what I believe is one of two cloud forests in Ecuador. The hour long walk through the jungle to her log home takes you across a long, rickety foot bridge, up a mountain, by wild orchids and wild lemon trees, across small rivers, through mud liable to suck your knee-high rubber boots off, down a mountain, near waterfalls, on and on and on. Linda’s 185 acres is split into a 160 acre plot and a 25 acre plot, and she has the 25 acre plot for sale. During our first trek in CJ and I were already brainstorming ideas of how to purchase the 25 acres…and we still are! The log home she built is two stories with what I would call a glorified widows watch as a third story, where I like to read, pray, and do yoga in the mornings.

There is a wrap around porch, 1 bedroom, a bathroom, full kitchen, living room, fireplace, and huge loft. If I had to describe the jungle in one word it would be pristine. It’s one of those places worthy of National Geographic Magazine and also too amazing to fully depict through words or photos. You just have to experience it…the mist, the vibrantly colored butterflies, the funky bright flowers, the variety of grasshoppers, the blanket of clouds, the roar of the river…you just have to experience it.

KATITAWA SCHOOL: For nearly a year prior to traveling to Ecuador I followed the happenings at Katitawa School on their blogs. I understood it to be an experiential Spanish/English primary school for the indigenous children of the small town of Salasaca. On their blogs it looked like a wonderfully successful program with construction going on, photos of the children engaging in cultural celebrations, and rave volunteer reviews. While the facilities are incredible, looks can be deceiving and after one day of volunteering it was clear to CJ and I, as well as the nearly dozen other volunteers there at the time, that the school lacked vision and organization. There was no curriculum, no class schedule, and no consistency as the school is almost entirely run by volunteers who come and go every few days or few weeks. If you’re thinking their disorganization was a real opportunity for us to help, forget it. It became very much apparent as soon as we started asking questions that they have no intention or desire to change. As CJ frames it, “It’s a glorified playground,” and because of that after two days we returned to Banos in search of a volunteer project that better fit our reasons for coming to Ecuador. We are now serving at Arte del Mundo (art of the world). For two months we will both assist with their incredible after-school program by playing board games and card games, doing art, and reading with children. Additionally, CJ will teach guitar to children, I will teach English to children and adults, and I will hopefully start a dance class for the children.

“WILL YOU MARRY ME?”… “FREELY & GLADLY, FREELY & GLADLY!!”: Exactly one year from the day CJ and I met, which just happened to be Valentine’s Day, we started the day by taking machetes to vines, which were forming a ceiling over the narrow path to Linda’s home. We fed two horses, planted the top of a pineapple, and chopped firework…all very appropriate Valentine’s Day activities wouldn’t you say? After lunch we set off on a 20-minute creek stomping adventure up to an impassable roaring waterfall. Upon arriving at the waterfall we sat to the side of it, sharing cheese and crackers. Knowing the thrill I get out of feeling the mist from a waterfall CJ suggested I cross the creek to where I could stand closest to the front of the waterfall. He followed me across, gave me a huge hug from behind and asked how I was doing. After responding that I had never been better and that I absolutely loved that spot he reached into his pocket, pulled out a ring, held it in front of me, and asked me to marry him. I immediately spun around and began hugging him and bawling…and bawling…and bawling. Eventually, I answered “freely and gladly, freely and gladly,” a term I use regularly and he totally anticipated. After he put the ring on my finger and we hugged and I cried some more he took a vile out of his pocket for us to collect some “engagement water” from the waterfall. Collecting water from places we visit is something both of us did before we met and now enjoy doing together. It was perfect.